I had a list of things I wanted to before I ‘grew up.’ For a long time, this was just a vague time in the future. Then it became by the time I was 18, then 20 because I decided no longer being a teen would mean being an adult. When my ED really got bad, I let myself have until 25.
Well, here I am. In an hour. I’ll share the list.
- Publish a novel
- Go to Oxford
- Lose my virginity and explore sexuality
- Read most of The Classics
- Spend a year travelling and volunteering
- Go to South America
- Do a TEFL course
- Be in a ‘proper’ relationship
- Get stoned and try something longer
- Have an article in a magazine
- Volunteer for GreenPeace
- Live on my own
- Have an idea about my career
- Run a half marathon (or at least a 10K)
- Have an ‘adult’ relationship with my parents
- Volunteer locally on a regular basis
- Swim between St Martins and Tresco
- Get Grade 8 in piano, viola, and violin
- Go to a festival
- Lead the orchestra
- Become one of ‘the year thirteens’
- Live in a more minimalistic fashion
- Apologise properly to Sam
Now, I could into great detail on each of those subjects, but I can also sum the whole list up very easily.
I have never done any of the things on that list.
I can’t believe how ashamed I am of myself