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CPA, ugh

twtcpa20logo

 

So, tomorrow it’s CPA time. I’ve never had a non-hospital CPA, so I’m not really sure what it’ll be like. Anyone have any experience?

I know the kinda stuff that’ll be talked about, as I had a talk with my care coordinator and my CPN:

  • Do I need to have a ‘body scan’ every week? I haven’t self harmed since I left hospital. (not that I’ve actually had an opportunity…)
  • Time away from my 24-hour carers (23 hours carers, 12 hours by my parent), so I can be by myself a bit in the house/people waiting outside the bathroom while I go…
  • Some respite time for my parents i.e. they can go away for a weekend.
  • More independence , as I haven’t self harmed etc, so I could actually go out on my own. Scary, but it needs to be done. I need to get away from my institutionalism; I never used to be so frightened.
  • Might be changing CPNs again. Great.
  • Do I need two people to go out with whenever I leave the house? It’s ridiculous.
  • DBS trial – are there opportunities to do it anywhere else in the country, as mine has completely fallen through.
  • Maybe doing a DBT programme (not specifically for EDs) – only problem being transfers, running over meal times, and messing with carers’ shifts. I just don’t see this one happening.

    TRIGGER.

  • The fact that I’m losing weight, and what’s gonna happen. In all fairness, I’m still a heavier weight than when I was chucked out of hospital, so I dunno why everyone’s still worried. So, I’ve lost a bit of weight recently? So what? I gained to the right BMI

(13)

for the DBS trial and nothing happened. I did my bit, and they didn’t do theirs. As far as I’m concerned, I can do whatever the hell I want now. I’m let down and angry, and my only coping mechanism is restricting. I’ve tried other stuff, but it doesn’t work.

 

Anyway, dreading the CPA, whilst wondering how it’ll work. I’d be interested if anyone knows how CPA’s work outside of a hospital setting?

Keep you posted, and keep fighting.

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Author:

Just a 25 year-old-English-gal trying to make her way through life, with all its ups and downs. I don't necessarily publish anything massively personal because I worry about triggering people big time, but if anyone has questions or memes they'd like me to do, then I'm up for it!

3 thoughts on “CPA, ugh

  1. Why don’t you write your own care plan. The nhs are turning away from the CPA approach – check out my page – it is really empowering. You don’t need to watch all the vblogs of me – you can just do the plan . It’s just something that may help you and it is free. I have made one and have got all the people around me to sign it. I have uploaded mine of my WRAP page- wellness recovery action plan. Whatever you do or don’t do= you are moving forwards. Is your bmi 13? https://daisywillows.wordpress.com/category/wrap/

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    1. Thank you so much. I did end up talking quite a bit, which I guess is the idea, although it was totally alien to me. It turned out to be not so much a CPA as a ‘Deprivation of Liberty’ assessment. I’ve already been deemed to have no mental capacity, but because I have 12 hours a day official care (i.e. organisations coming in), there’s debate whether this is totally okay. For instance, if I got in a taxi somewhere, at the moment they would follow me and call the police. Do they have right? It’s all going to a court.

      Gonna take a look at your page, because now I have an ACTUAL CPA next week. Gah, too many meetings! Why won’t they leave me alone??

      Thanks darling x

      Like

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